Career Advice from Dilbert

Scott Adams, the creator of the wonderfully funny (and scarily accurate) Dilbert comic strip shares his advice on how to have a successful life.

If you want an average successful life, it doesn’t take much planning. Just stay out of trouble, go to school, and apply for jobs you might like. But if you want something extraordinary... become very good (top 25%) at two or more things.

Over-analysing my enthusiasm

I'm involved in a number of projects at the moment, both personal and professional. I've put some thought into looking at how my enthusiasm for a project varies over time, mostly I do this thinking when my enthusiasm for everything else is low. Once I've flattened out short term bumps (post caffeine high, queued at bank slump) there are 2 ways I approach projects, converging to a point and then each splitting depending on the success of the project. I apologise for this astonishingly poor graphic.



Starting with high enthusiasm we have the green and blue lines, for me these applies often to projects that have lots of other people involved. At the start there's lots of enthusiasm for the new idea, you share visions and concepts and discuss big picture stuff. Then your project moves in to development and you slump to a mid level, you're still excited about the end results and what you'll be able to do, but you seem to spend your life in meetings discussing nitty gritty.

Then the lines diverge, the green line plummets as you realise that your amazing idea has been committee'd to death and your vision is now a lowest common denominator. Motivation goes through the floor and the project either dies or lingers around hoping for a version 2 release that will do all the amazing stuff you previously dreamed of.

More optimistically your project finishes and you have a burst of enthusiasm (hopefully accompanied by a celebration of some sorts, be it a pay rise, a party or just a drink in the pub). Your enthusiasm probably decreases gradually over time, but it's a natural aging process which can be bumped up again by the smallest of things, a nice email from a user, or a throw-away remark about how well things went.

The other style of curve is shown in the red and purple lines, I more commonly follow these tracks for personal projects. You start off with an inkling of an idea that matures slowly in your brain until you reach a peak, maybe you talk to someone else about it who enthuses, or you just kick yourself into giving it a shot. Your enthusiasm takes a big hit as you're forced to deal with details, often something to do with money, paperwork or permissions.

Red is danger here, this is a project that crashes and burns. All your enthusiasm and plottings just sort of cave in around you, maybe you lose confidence in your abilities (rightly or wrongly), maybe you are let down by other people, maybe what you wanted to do just isn't possible. For whatever reason your project just never gets off the ground. You struggle along for a little while, but eventually give up and declare it dead, leaving your enthusiasm at an all time low, with no motivation for starting another project.

Purple here though is positive, Eventually you force your way through the hastles and can actually get on with what you want to do. Enthusiasm rises and with a bit of luck and effort, continues to rise as you watch your vague idea develop into something wonderful. The great thing about a project that works like this is that even if it has an end point your enthusiasm afterwards can be even higher (a holiday for example when you can look at the photos). You're a lot more likely to repeat the process all over again with a little more experience and knowledge, making the slump less slumpy.

Of course knowing what these curves look like doesn't really help you identify what colour your current project is, or even that you're not on another curve all together, maybe there's an option on the red curve that if you stick with the really depressing bit long enough it will pick up and go through the roof. But if you're bleeding money and energy into a project that seems to be going nowhere, there's not necessarily any comfort in looking that far ahead.

The advice I'd give is that for whatever the outcome of your project it's valuable to look back and consider these curves. When you're in a slump, look back on previous successful projects and remember that you came out ahead in the end. If your project fails work out why it did and make a mental note to not fall into the same trap in the future. Learn your own personal signs for a failing project and react to either avoid the pit falls or get out faster before your future enthusiasm and confidence take a permanent hit.

And if you work out how to actually do that, let me know ;0)

It's all about the biscuits

I figured it was about time I wrote a post explaining this blog's tagline - "it's all about the biscuits".

I believe very strongly that of the many thousands of pieces of advice that can be offered (and we will continue to offer) about how to improve your office morale it can be broken down to something very very simple. It's all about the biscuits.

This doesn't mean you shouldn't pay your staff a decent wage, be flexible about working hours, listen to them and encourage their individuality and creativity. But while you're doing all that, just make sure there's some decent biscuits available. For the sake of a couple of quid a week you can get nice chocolate digestives, hobnobs or just a decent selection box.

The very worst thing you can do is have biscuits available for meetings and then not allow your staff to eat them, or have different 'classes' of biscuit - good ones for meetings with important people, mediocre ones for less important people and cheap ones for your staff. Classism by biscuits is not a healthy message to be sending.

Splurge occasionally and bring in Krispy Kreme doughnuts. Get in cakes for people's birthdays and anniversaries at work. If money is a bit tight, encourage people (and set a good example) to bake cookies and bring them in.

From Indexed

Over the last few weeks in my office we have had cake to celebrate a birthday and someone's 10th anniversary with the company, champagne to celebrate someone's engagement and lots of leftover food from meetings because they intentionally over-cater so there's enough for staff. That cost may be 50quid and increased office morale a huge amount, it made us feel like a group of colleagues rather than just isolated individuals.

It's also a good opportunity for everyone to get together and chat. It's not a formal meeting but it's a good chance to listen to staff and find out what's going on. Why not just knock off work half hour early every Friday, get some sort of food in chat about how the week's been?

See Also
Sometimes it's about tea

Let's get rid of management!

Why do we need management in the first place? The following message was published in the Wall Street Journal by United Technologies Corporation, Connecticut. As someone who leads in the outdoors and then "manages" in the office, I couldn't agree more.

Let's get rid of management!
People don't want to be managed.
They want to be led.
Whoever heard of a world manager?
World leader, yes.
Educational leader, yes.
Political leader, yes.
Business leader, yes.
They lead. They don't manage.
The carrot always wins over the stick.
Ask your horse.
You can lead your horse to water, but you can't manage him to drink.
If you want to manage somebody, manage yourself.
Do that well and you'll be ready to stop managing. And, start leading.

Tea, Coffee......or leave

From the formation of the British East India Company in 1600 until 1947, the British were control of the Indian subcontinent. They achieved this fueled by and in search of one beverage, tea. Over four hundred million people lubricated the hard work of powering an empire with an infusion of Camellia sinensis.

Tea still plays an enormous part in everyday British life, and nowhere more so than at work. Nowadays, other beverages are catching up fast. Coffee is the frequently offered alternative but the range of hot drinks available stretches from the sublime to the ridiculous. It doesn't matter what you, the boss, or that odd lady who does the payroll drinks, as long as you drink something.

Leaving aside the health benefits of drinking tea (green, herbal, camomile or otherwise), or even of just drinking fluids, a cup of tea is an important psychological tool.

Chinese philosopher T'ien Yiheng said "Tea is drunk to forget the din of the world" and he makes a good point. Stuck trying to solve an intractable puzzle? Give yourself space, go and make a cup of tea. You won't stop thinking about the problem, but you will break out of the knot you've formed in your head. Stuck doing a boring, repetitive task? Reward yourself with cups of tea at appropriate intervals, motivate yourself by thinking "After another 200 rows of customer records analysed, I'll have a chai latte".

Tea is also a fine relationship builder. Need to speak to someone about a sensitive issue? Invite them to make a cup of tea and join you somewhere private. Upset someone a few desks away? Make them a "Ginger and Gunpowder Zinger" and take one over as a peace offering. Use it to establish rapport and break the ice at meetings, everyone feels better chatting over a cup of tea.

Establish a community within your company using tea. Offer to 'make the tea' occasionally and use it as an excuse to chat to others at their desk. Include everyone nearby in your rounds, leaving someone out of a tea run is akin to being stood up on prom night. Encourage everyone, including the boss, to do a tea run. It takes ten minutes and leaves everyone in the office a little happier.

A tea bag costs about a penny, less in bulk. Even adding in milk, sugar (to taste) and the cost of heating the water, a cup of tea costs less than 3p. In a company of average tea drinkers (3 cups a day), that's 45p per employee per week.

Is 45p a week worth it for a more relaxed, more motivated, more tactful, friendlier employee?